Or perhaps it’s not as controversial as Kobie hoped. I for one did not squirm in my seat since I know that “Life is complicated and messy.” I am very thankful that I do not live under such conditions but I am well aware that many people do.

We know that where human needs are greatest is also where bad decisions often make things worse. Recently there was a Pew Foundation study reinforcing this. It showed that in poverty-stricken parts of the world, the men (what, always the men?) have zero money for their children’s schoolbooks or rent. Yet they manage to find money for booze and other chemical forms of escape. Yet don’t the rich squander as foolishly on multiple houses, yachts and private planes?

While we can ponder our philosophy of giving (or not giving) to beggars on the street, we can get a call from a friend or relative – someone whose cry for help we cannot ignore. That cry for help can be tinged with anger and frustration, from someone who does not want to need your help. Worse, we often get such calls when the situation is far beyond our ability to help.

I know I have felt uncomfortable when approached for help. Is it a deadbeat? Someone truly in need? Someone who could get violent? Many times I have shied away from a sense of self-preservation, only thinking in retrospect how I might have helped with little risk to myself or my family. But too late! The chance is gone, I failed another test! Or is it that I warded off another threat? Years later, I still wonder about some encounters.

I don’t need pastors assuring me everything is OK. I just need reminders that there may be another test at any moment.